In a sort of off-the-wall way, I found my calling-Listen [Sings] Up every morning, out every evening Hustling for headlines, that's what I do Table at Sardi's, grappling for gossip Working the press for a mention or two Paperman [Cont.] I never acted like some nervous rookie Right from the start I was hot as a cookie I was the numero uno What a debut Chorus Public Relations, Public Relations Boozing and schmoozing, that's what I do PR's my vocation And I'm a sensation Public relations Such hullabaloo But I went full throttle Never could slow down Then out of nowhere a mild heart attack Middle age crisis Face the big questions Had to get off of this foolish fast track It all started out As an ad in the paper Now it's turned into A tropical caper But it's only public relations And that's what I do Chorus Public Relations, Public Relations Ego inflation, that's what I do Isn't it wonderful, isn't it fabulous Public Relations, such hullabaloo Give this some thought Norman Things can get sticky Here in the tropics Wine turns to glue Norman I've never seen such a beautiful ocean Iris Holy Sweet Jesus, he's got no clue Norman I'll buy this place I am expatriating Iris You as a landlord Sounds intoxicating It's only Public Relations Who's screwing who No, not that old PR Of yacking and quacking Making folks happy That's what I'll do Sunshine and sea air Palm trees, martinis That's what I yearn for -- Like you, you, and you Just give me some time And I'll make it come true
And now even those sales are under attack
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